Please help me!! Your mom can also try to stir up some excitement around you coming home from school; looking out of the window with your daughter here comes Mommy! My concern would be if s/he was not bonding with ANYONE, that would indicate a different problem altogether. Adjusting to this new life will take time and you can't expect to nail it right out of the gate. If I feed him, he fusses, straightens. what am I to do !! should i stop my caregiver from sleeping next to her to maybe stop them from being too close? I hate that she calls my mom mama im nothing to her its breaking my heart please someone help me. I dont know what to do. Its putting a lot of strain on our relationship. Im teaching and comes back home in the early evening. You are so sweet and encouraging!! I rush home to see her and she cries/moans when she sees me I hold my hands out to her and she clings to whoever she is with at the time. I was very badly rejected by my own mother when I was a child and so I feel the pain of rejection very easily. Somtimes she seems to get very distressed, but at bedtime I read to her and hold her, my wife says Im the best person to get her to sleep? I made a point to kiss him and cheerfully say things like Oh, you want to play with Dadda? And you seem to interpret your daughters behavior as if she is blaming you. I think its about time she stood up to her dad & told him but she as always been scared of him just like her older brother scared to say boo. Doesnt really explain the fact hes always preferred her since he was born. And yes, I think that would be great for many reasons. I'm very upset that she is rejecting the bottle. But unless one is emotionally stable, it can be almost impossible. It has shown to be a very effective tool to make children both bond and co-operate instead of challenging us and our rules. or something similar. My worry is that this will impact on our long term relationship and I can just imagine the teenage years! She is also my miracle child since I have a problem to conceive. she fetches her from pre school to be with her , she does mind going with him but when im there , she even cries, she can take anything that he bring her , bt wont allow him to hold her or talk to him. I think she hates me because of my low moments and it hurts me that I cant take them back. Babies can feel our tension. :) :) :). What scares me the most is that I dont want her to start having tantrums when she cant get what she wants. I have a 16 or 17 month cousin, but she calls me Mom! Please hang in there mommies and daddies. hi.. i am a mother of 6 month old twin boys. Please help! I understand what you are saying about your little girl. Ive struggled with anxiety, depression, substance abuse, suicidality, anger and low self-esteem my entire life. Your girls are now 8 months old. It really hurts. 6 wk old son doesn't like me (his mother) by: Anonymous. my daughter is now one year old and our bond has strengthened. Unfortunately she has developed a deep bond with my mother (as to be expected) and not me. This is painful, really painful. So a temporary solution is essential. If she is with me then she walks a way the moment she hears or sees her grandma. (It has absolutely NOTHING to do with how much you love your daughter; that was an insensitive and completely incorrect comment by your dad!). Our song hs never stoppd being sung even my hsband ws around. read about this website and how it all started here. Ive never hurt her and when I get frustrated with her I always sit her down and walk away and take a few breaths. I have watched them interact from a distance and she smiles, dances, and plays with him. Its got to a point where I feel like everything is against me. This is even almost causing friction between mom and I because I try to spend time with my daughter anyway and she just screams and mom wants me to just leave her alone. She doesnt want me at all, except whn she needed 2have milk. Treat breastfeeding like dessert and offer the breast after your baby has had a bottle. My Mom is the one that takes care of most things around the house while I am working. But when daddy comes home, she always seems to forget my existence. The "opt out" revolution of high-earning women exiting the labor force to have babies, widely publicized in the early 2000s, may have been overstated. Since about 3 months old she prefers daddy over mommy but now it is to the point where she tells me I dont love you I love my daddy. She pushes me away and wants nothing to do with me. Ive made the comment to my husband on several occasions, but now that my daughter is 3 and expresses herself verbally it is really affecting me. bottomline she just wanted my husband.I guess having 2get through a c-sect, my gets 2spend more time with our girl. If this has happened to you, you might be sad, worried, and frustrated. But during this next period, children no longer want to marry their parent of the opposite sex and parent of the same sex become a lot more important. Above all, enjoy these last few weeks with your little one. (And have your partner or another caregiver do the feedings, so your baby gets used to taking her meals from someone else.) so that she wont see me as a monster trying to take her away? i dont know why he is acting like this .Does he hate me or doesnt feel secure with me ? If i let her have her way, ill never get to be with her because she never wants me. Your son loves you no less because he enjoys the company of his grandma. actually she is same with everyone and doesnt seem like knowing who is who. 1. Then when my mother-in-law came to pick him up so I could go to work and I tried to give him a kiss he wouldnt let me and he hit me in the face and cried when I tried to give and hug and hold him he cried. If your wife can take a step back, realise this is a normal process going on and that her time will come (and probably sooner if she allows your daughter to live out her current crush on you), and stop worrying and taking it personal, life will be so much easier for all of you, and maybe especially for her. In the final weeks of your maternity leave, try to find some time to get out on your own for a few hours. When he comes home, her face glows in a way that its never glowed for me. Try to reach out to your mom and ask for her help. But all this can be easily changed! Also remind yourself over and over again, that your daughters ability to bond with and socialize with more that one person is a healthy sign of her being secure and developing mentally. My baby was very attached to me but now she doesnt love me at all, she only wants my mother, she even calls her mama and she doesnt call me anything, she only wants to be with her , when she is sick or not sick, when she is sleepy etc She cries when my mom goes out and when my mom comes home she gets very happy and runs to her, i have cried every night for the past 2 weeks it hurts me so bad to see her not loving me, on the weekends i go out with her alone trying to spend more time with her, but its doesnt work at all!!!! Paula, do you think its because of the association with bad things?? First thing to remember is to feed the baby. It really hurts and more so because i am going through so many medical problems after my pregnancy. You know, she is way too young to be that rancorous. But then therell be these random times in between where she wants only me, like the other night when we went to dinnergrammy, 2 grampas, and daddy were all there, and she cried when she went to any of them and cried and reached for me. Tonight, he did not want to come to me she had to push him on me! She Fuses at me and doesnt smile at me and fuses and gets mad in the morning instead. If it is fairly new maximum 1 year or so what is going on is actually a completely natural development stage in your daughters life. Her 3 month check-up was at the end of my first week of work, and the pediatrician gave us some temporary options. Dont let this woman take your child. Rather the contrary; that you have helped him become so secure that he is now ready to face the world. My MIL sees him once a week. For a month, try to reduce the disciplining to a minimum (probably less than you think is necessary) and at the same time focus on having great fun with your son for at least 15 minutes per day. Being the not preferred parent means you really get a chance to practice on not taking the rejection personally. Ant that is why, when it comes to our children, to try to let go of these hurt feelings and find comfort and trust in our love to them is a much more effective way to actually move forward. I dont think putting your whole life in a more stressful state by moving should be your first choice, in case living with your mom works well in all other aspects. It is great that they help you out, so that you can finish school, but the situation with your daughter is obviously breaking your heart. In the world of occupational therapy, you often hear about the sensory and emotional needs of older kids who are struggling with sensory processing. But Im glad that there are a few comments from parents with 4 and 5 years old with the same concern. In fact its more mummy than daddy, and my husband is a little bit jealous of this. Take your baby for a casual walk. I thought ever child wanted their mommies especially when they arent feeling well. ), are hard-wired so to speak to love their mothers, absent significant abuse and/or neglect. She wants to go to ANYONE (atleast any relative that shes familiar with) instead of me; her dad most importantly. I bathe with her, I nurse her, I stay up with her in the wee hours of the night, I sing to her, I play with her, I carry her, I feed her, I change her I cannot fathom how she could possible love her caregiver or father more than me. I feel very sad when this happens as I am already sitting in my home for her resigned from my job.She never wants to come to me. I spent a lot of time crying and have found it hard, but I have loved my son and spent 7 months with him looking after him playing with him feeding him etc. So he cant do whatever he wants when Im home. Instead allow yourself to really enjoy your time with your daughter. Since your baby just recently started to reject you, you dont have to worry about the overall bonding with your baby. She even goes to our maid servent and she is so happy if she sees her. I am also the sole breadwinner in my family. Just continue to be there for her and show that you are still around even if things are not exactly like before. Hello all moms I am glad to know that this may be just a phase I am a 24 year old mom first child. If she is secure enough to bond with your mother this quickly, chances are that the bond between you and your daughter will also happen very naturally and grow strong. Employees who have access to these benefits express 1.5 times greater work satisfaction and are 2.5 times less likely to miss . Hello everyone i am a stay home mom from the day my baby boy was born i do EVERYTHING for him!!! Chances are that he will start to listen and co-operate much better if you have more fun together. He always trying to get daddys attention instead. During these 15 minutes, focus only on your son and on showing him interest and love. Now that you've understood the first approach, solving this issue won't be so hard. I want to tell you: this will pass. Consider your overall financial picture. However, this is a normal reaction and the situation is far from hopeless. (, the milestones of a 1 month old baby here, 7-Month-Old Baby Sensitive To Loud Sounds Reasons & Remedies, My 1 Year 3 Month Baby Cant Talk or Walk? A very sleepy baby may accept a bottle without even realizing it, so if your baby's resisting, try slipping in that target near the end of a nap, when she's still half asleep. My mom watches her while I work, and she seems to be more attached to my mom. lately, i feel so depressed and down, because my boys seem to prefer they nannies over me. I was born to an ignorant mother who failed to nurture me. So here comes my last advice. 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